This isn’t the cheeriest subject, but it’s an important one: what happens if you separate from your long-term partner but you aren’t married? Where do you stand legally?

Money, property, children, pensions… there can be a lot of things to consider. Whether you’ve split from your partner, are considering breaking up, or are in a perfectly happy relationship… whatever your situation, it makes sense to know the legal rights you both have, so you can plan your future with confidence.

Many people think that after a certain number of years, you become a ‘common-law’ wife or husband – but there really is no such thing. It doesn’t matter how many years you have lived together, or even if you’ve had children – if you have not been legally married, then neither partner is entitled to the assets or income belonging to the other if you separate.

This is a big issue – according to the Office of National Statistics, British marriage rates are at an all time low (the number of couples tying the knot has dropped by a whopping 34% since 1981).

Today more than 40% of children are born outside of marriage. Perhaps it’s not all that surprising (especially in these economically strained times) as the potential costs of marriage – everything from wedding ceremonies to divorce settlements – can be high.

However, the costs of cohabitation could be even more expensive if you go through the separation process without knowing where you stand.

• Maintenance
• Assets
• Bank Accounts
• Property
• Children
• Pensions
• Debts

Separation

Maintenance Neither partner has the right to maintenance if you have just been co-habiting, regardless of the length of your relationship.

Assets You both get to take from the relationship any property that you can prove is yours, including things like heirlooms and vehicles. You may need to show receipts if it all goes to court, so make sure you keep proof of purchase of anything you buy.

Bank Accounts If you have separate accounts and are not married (or in a civil partnership) then neither of you have access to the money in the other’s account. If you have a joint account, you both have the right to access the money while it is in both your names. To close a joint account, a bank needs the consent of both parties.

However, if you are the only one putting money into the account, the technical legal position is that the money (and any purchases) belong to you – though you’d likely need to prove this in court (through a financial audit trail of wage slips etc).

Property

If you have bought a property together as Joint Tenants or Tenants-in-Common it can be sold and the proceeds split according to the contract. If you both own the property and one of you wants to sell and the other does not, you can apply to the court to let them decide. However, if the property is in the name of just one person, the other partner will not have a right to any of it.

There is an exception: if you can show that you have contributed directly to buying the property or improving it in some substantial way. This is known as a ‘beneficial interest’. You do need to show proof of this, though, such as bank statements that show how much of the mortgage you have paid or receipts for redecoration and furniture.

If you can prove that there was always an intention to entitle you to a share of the property this may hold some weight for a court; however, proving this can be a lengthy, hard and frustrating process – with no guarantee of success.

The only other exception may come if you have had children together. See the section below for details of this.

NB: Scottish law is slightly different, and does provide some rights to protect cohabitants. Individuals in Scotland still do not have the same rights as married couples, however. A guide to family living and cohabitation in Scotland can be found here.

Children

Even if you don’t have any share in your partner’s property, you may be able to claim a share in your partner’s property on your children’s behalf under the Children’s Act. This is dependent on your circumstances – your solicitor will be able to advise you on this.

If you have had children together, then the courts may allow the partner caring for the children to live in the home you used to share while the children are growing up. But this doesn’t always happen and they may have to find somewhere else. You can apply for maintenance for your children through the CSA.

Pensions

You have no right to any of your ex-partner’s pensions or investments, however long you have been together (or if one of you dies).

Debts

On the plus side (about the only one if you separate when you have been cohabiting) you will also not be liable for any of their debts, unless it’s a loan which is in your joint names. (To legally be in your joint names, you will have had to sign the debt agreement as required under the Consumer Credit Act.)

The other exception is credit cards – if the credit card is in your name. Should this be the case, you are liable for debts on the card (even if your partner is down as the ‘named user’.)

All in all, if you have been living together unmarried for a long time before you split, one or both of you could find that the sorrow of parting is not in the least bit sweet!